Oh hello there! It has been almost 2 years since I have written anything on this blog! I wanted to end this phase of my life on the right note and give my (three) fans closure on what in the world is going on with me!
-30- means “end of story.” It was also the title of the last episode of The Wire.
Here goes!
2014 – Life is going ok that summer! I suffered a horrible breakout because I was using the Clarisonic on my face 2 times a day!!!! I had no idea what was going on!!!!!! That is ok … that has been long rectified! Hair was still growing, but I did not notice length retention as much because once I hit waist length, I just did not do progress pics! Nathan finished law school and failed the bar. Law school did a number on our relationship.
2015 – Oh what a year!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! At the end of January, Nathan and I break up. He makes plans to move back to Hawaii in early February. I meet a handsome older gent on Valentine’s Day and step into a relationship like no other. It was filled with highs and lows. He was well-to-do, so I had dinners out every night at great restaurants all over Portland. I had access to his home in the hills overlooking the city. We went on trips, but all was not well. Slowly but surely, I began to feel insecure and did not know why! The root of that insecurity was because I was in an emotionally abusive and neglectful relationship. I was never skinny enough, working out hard enough, etc. He never told me how he felt about me in any positive way. It was constant belittling, even though I lost 10 pounds (hooray!) and got stronger (my max squat was 180 lbs)! Another sad thing is that my beloved Yorkie, Landon, passed when we were on our way to Las Vegas for the Mayweather fight on May 1st. I was beyond devastated.
Well, that relationship ended in August and I met a guy (who I am still friends with!) that I had a great time with until The One came around in September …
I met The One on match.com. He messaged me my first or second day on the site. At first, I had him filtered out because he was too young for me (he was 34 at the time, my minimum was 37). I decided to answer him anyway. He seemed cute from his picture. He asked me to meet him on Labor Day afternoon for a drink. I agreed. It was the most boring date I had ever been on. He was fidgety, talked incessantly about things I did not care about and barely asked me any questions. I kept looking at my phone. After 90 minutes, I said I had to go. He walked me outside and said “I’ll see you soon!” and I thought “No you won’t!” I immediately went to the store and got a pack of cigarettes and went to take my emotionally abusive ex-boyfriend food because he was sick. That is how bad it was.
Tuesday, he texts wanting to hang out and I put him off … Wednesday the same. Thursday I was in the mood to get dolled up and go out to eat on someone else’s dime (remember I was used to dinners out with the ex), so I text him and asked if he wanted to meet up. Of course he did. This date went sooooooooo much better and I found out that he was funny and witty … nothing like the dry accountant that showed up on Monday! We have been together ever since. Within two weeks, he asked me to marry him in my pantry! HAHAHAH!
I am in such a good space and am the happiest I have ever been with someone! Life is very, very good and I do feel blessed beyond my wildest dreams!
OK … this is a hair blog. So what’s the tea on the hair? My hair is doing alright! 2015 was a horrible year for it, though! I stopped taking birth control back in April because I was tired of the faux hormones and the side effects. I suffered from migraines and nausea almost like clockwork. While I felt better, my estrogen levels plummeted and my thick hair began a pseudo postpartum shed in June (right on cue!) Throughout the summer, my once lush ponytail got thinner and thinner! One the upside, I also got thinner and thinner. I lost about 12 lbs after coming of the pill. I had to sell my old lulu, as they were too big. I was able to wear their Speed shorts, because now I had legs and thighs that I was proud to show off! The shedding stabilized in August and I had a few “strings” left. I also noticed that it was getting very tangly and I would comb knots out of my hair while detangling. That was due to a horrible leave-in that I had to replace my beloved Alterna White Truffle Elixir! I still had length, but it was nothing like it was in early May and June. I swear it went from waist length to mid-back length without me even cutting it!
September rolls around and I am near the end of a relaxer stretch. Hair is fine, length is stabilizing and growing. I eventually stretched for 6 months once I finally ended it in October! On October 9th, 2015, a cloudy and rainy fall day, I had what I called D-Day for my hair. I was doing my relaxer prep. I clarified, did my ApHogee 2 step, deep conditioned … the norm. I skipped pre-pooing and just went to clarifying my hair. I had not washed my hair in 2 weeks and had been wearing it in a bun. OH. MY. GOD. My hair became so matted when it was time to detangle. I was afraid I was going to have to cut my hair!!! I was almost in tears! (I am cringing as I write this … with my relaxer prep pre-poo in full effect 😉 ) I had no choice but to detangle. I used tons of conditioner and eventually got my hair detangled 90 minutes later (The One was returning from NYC that night so I had nothing but time). I was even supposed to get a blow out but had to cancel! You should have seen how much hair was lost. I typically save my hair to track shedding, but could not even stomach to see it. I remember having just balls of hair sliding out. I didn’t know how I didn’t end up bald! I estimate I lost about 25% of my hair that day … no lie. And with that, my hair’s length was just gone. I think it may have been a sad BSL at it’s longest point. My troublesome right side looked like it was damn near ear length … LOL … nah, it was definitely between APL and BSL. I was sooooooooo sad, but had no choice but to start over. I pretty much cut out roller sets and heat for about 2 months and let my hair air dry and wore buns. I started to see some progress in December around Christmastime. My hair was thicker and stronger. I was also retaining a bit of length. I still noticed something that had been bothering me since I moved into my new apartment in June. I noticed that my hair always seemed dry and lackluster. The right side just laid there so lank, dead. It responded to heat, but within an hour or two, my whole head of hair just felt “swollen” and “puffy.” I had no idea what was going on. Something told me it may be the water quality. I assumed that since I lived in the Pacific Northwest, my water would be as good as it was at my old apartment. Boy, was I wrong! I believe the pipes were old and that this water was more chlorinated that my old apartment’s water. I was about to move in with The One anyway, so I ordered a handheld shower filter AND another filter that attached to the spout … to be doubly sure! SURE ENOUGH … it was the water quality. Once I began washing my hair with the filtered water, it became soft, retained moisture and the right side sprang to life again!
Today, my hair is on the rebound from the setback of the fall! I have all these little baby hairs growing up! I am still trimming to keep things even since my hair is not as thick due to the shedding! My hair is now at mid-back length again. It will probably be waist-length again by the early autumn. Even though I must the volume of my ponytails and such while on birth control, I notice that my hair does grow faster without it. That is one thing I have never had a problem with and that is growing hair! I have stopped trimming so much so that I can actually retain some length! Moreso than the length, I am excited to see my hair thicken back up as the new hairs mature and grow! My volume was on borrowed time with those pills, as they mimic pregnancy …
Speaking of pregnancy … that will probably be my next blog! After a lifetime of not wanting children, The One and I have decided after our marriage in the fall, if God blesses us, we will become parents! I have even started collecting diapers (hahahah!) We are heading to Australia in December … maybe we will be so fortunate to create there! HAHAHAHHA! I will link that blog once I begin it!
Thank you to those who took this journey with me starting in January 2012! I have been through so much since then … got to past waist length, lost it all, now growing it back! I loved the community of learning and cheering each other on! And while I still love my hair, there are only so many Wash Days I can write about … they are pretty much the same now! My life has taken a different direction and my priorities have shifted a little! The abundance of time I had to dedicate to writing with a partner in law school is no longer the case with a partner who works the same hours as me!
If you are interested in life updates, you call follow me on Instagram @ellenwindsor. I will also post a link here when I start the blog chronicling the next phase of my life journey!
Until next time, happy hair growth and many blessings!
LaShanda